This article was originally published October 23, 2009.

It’s the weekend before Halloween, so it might be too late to put together a haunted house of your own this year.

But if you’re like us, you’ll probably be attending at least one haunted house. And afterward, you’ll ask yourself and your friends: was it any good?

In other words, it’s never to late to ask: what makes a perfect haunted house?

Give it a Theme

The single biggest mistake that most haunted houses make is merely being a mish-mash of unrelated rooms and monsters. But human beings experience and make sense of the world by looking for patterns and designs. Your haunted house will make more sense, and have much of an impact, if you hang everything on some kind of theme.

In short, a haunted house is — or should be — more than the sum total of its disembodied parts.

And for the record? “Haunted Mansion” is just about the most boring, over-used theme imaginable — followed closely by “Insane Insane Asylum”, “Mad Scientists Lab,” and “Haunted Graveyard.”

Much better? “Attack of the Giant Spiders,” “Honey, I Shrunk the Haunted House,” or “Children of the Cornfield Maze.” And what haunted house enthusiast wouldn’t want to dare “The Curse of the Mummy’s Tomb,” about adventurers who get stuck in an Egyptian pyramid?

Think of it as a Story

It’s not enough for a haunted house to have a theme. A haunted house should also have a structure: a “beginning,” a “middle,” and a satisfying “end.”

In other words, a fantastic haunted house tells a story with a set-up, which introduces the theme; rising tension as the visitors probe deeper and deeper into your set-up and confront increasingly impressive scenarios; and some sort of satisfying conclusion that sort of wraps it all up and maybe leaves people with something to think about.

For example, if you’re “theme” is “The Walk of the Executed,” you’ll probably be telling the story of someone — i.e. your visitor — who is condemned to die. The first part of the haunted house might include a ghostly judge in a courtroom who makes the sentence from his or her worm-infested bench. Next up, the visitor is sent to “prison” — where other condemned and howling prisoners wait to die. After that, there’s certainly room for an unorthodox “last meal” and a place where the evil priest can ask for “last words.” The culmination, of course, is the execution itself, where the visitor is to be put to death — until, perhaps, a last-second reprieve.

(Incidentally? There’s a reason why fireworks shows save their best explosions for last. Your last room should be the most spectacular too.)

Anyway, having your haunted house tell an actual story involves the visitor in two ways: first, by tying the individual rooms together, they’ll make more sense and have more impact. But second, since (unlike a movie) a haunted house is a “live” walk-through event, your visitors can literally be a character in the action.

The more you involve them in the story, the bigger the impact.

More is More (But Less is More Too)

It’s a haunted house — hey, blood and bodies are de rigueur! But it’s important to have “quieter” moments even in haunted houses — and not just in the hallways between the rooms.

On first glance, this might seem a little like wasted space, but it’s not. Every good storyteller knows that, while the overall structure means gradually rising tension, there are moments when the tension falls again. Why? If everything is the same level of intensity, soon everything starts to feel indistinguishable – and boring.

In short, varying the intensity will keep your guests off-guard and ironically end up making them more scared.

Play With Expectations

Anyone older than the age of six has already been to about 50,000 haunted houses in their life — and we’ve seen 50,000 more monster movies. So people come to each new haunted house with certain … expectations. But this is not a bad thing! In fact, it’s a perfect opportunity to screw with your visitors’ minds.

Example: as they enter a room, the coffin slowly begins to open. Naturally, everyone’s attention will be focused there, expecting the rising of a vampire.

Which means, of course, that this is the perfect moment to hit them with a giant spider from above!

It’s More Important to be Fun Than it is to be Scary

Who exactly is a haunted house ultimately made for? Hint: it’s not the creators.

Yes, it’s the visitors. After all, they’re the ones paying to get in, right? And if nothing else, you want good word-of-mouth. Always remember this.

Everyone comes to a haunted house to be scared, but no one comes to be splashed with water or hit in the face or lose their balance or get poked by a loose nail.

It’s also possible for a haunted house to be too scary, or at least too unpleasant. The gore can be a little too realistic, and the monsters can be too in-your-face.

If it’s a choice between between “cool” or “scary,” we say go with cool every time.

Pictures are from Spider Rider’s Halloween.

On Sunday, NBC aired this promo for the soon-to-open Wizarding World of Harry Potter Florida theme park attraction (located inside Universal Studio’s Islands of Adventure theme park):

Orlando Attractions Magazine has posted their latest update, including video, on the developments at the Wizarding World of Harry Potter attraction being built at Universal Studios’ Islands of Adventures theme park in Orlando, Florida.

It’s really coming along! The project will open this spring.

More pictures and video here.

Talk about stepping on Disney’s toes!

Just several days after Disney announced some modest expansions to its theme parks, Universal Studios has released extensive details about its new Wizarding World of Harry Potter attraction opening next spring at Universal Studios Islands of Adventure in Orlando, Florida.

The attraction, which is being designed, in part, by the Harry Potter movies’ production designer Stuart Craig and art director Alan Gilmore, will include a mix of newly built attractions and reconfigured existing attractions from the park.

The premiere new attraction is Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey, “a thrilling new state-of-the-art attraction that uses entirely new technology to bring the magic, characters and stories of Harry Potter to life in ways never before experienced.”

It will be located inside a newly constructed Hogwart’s castle.

The second major ride is called Flight of the Hippogriff, a “family” roller-coaster that simulates a hippogriff training flight over Hogwart’s.

Other new attractions include eating establishments such as The Three Broomsticks and Hog’s Head, which“will feature traditional British fare and drinks including Butterbeer and pumpkin juice.”

Ollivanders’ wand shop promises an “incredibly interactive experience” where, presumably, wands will somehow pick their owners, and Dervish and Banges will sell quidditch equipment, Triwizard apparel, spectrespecs and remembralls.

The third major ride in the attraction is a reconfigured one: Dragon Challenge, a pair of dueling roller-coasters that previously existed in the park as Dueling Dragons. Although the ride was always fantasy-themed, it will get a make-over to make it more in keeping with the world of Harry Potter.

The entire attraction — called “a park within the park” — will be spread over 20 acres and is said to be costing Universal $265 million.

According to the New York Times, the Walt Disney Company has announced plans for several revisions in its U.S. theme parks, including a renovation of the Star Tours attraction at several parks and an expansion of Fantasyland at Disney World in Orlando, Florida.

The Fantasyland additions are thought to be a response to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter, a highly-anticipated attraction opening next year at Universal Studio’s Islands of Adventure, a rival Florida theme park.

Many media outlets, including the Times, are calling these “major” park revisions, but they actually seem quite modest, especially in comparison to Harry Potter.

The new additions to Disney World’s Fantasyland include an area where attendees can interact with Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, and Belle. The Dumbo the Flying Elephant ride will be redesigned, and Pixie Hollow, a existing Disneyland attraction, will be added to the land.

A redesigned Dumbo ride? Be-still my beating heart!

Meanwhile, Star Tours at both Disneyland and Disney World will reopen in 2011 with 3-D effects, and the ride will be redesigned around the three most recent Star Wars “prequel” movies.

In addition to these recent announcements, Disney is already currently working on a $1 billion expansion of its California Adventure theme park in Anaheim.

Four and a Half Torches (Out of Five)

I first visited Disney’s Animal Kingdom, part of the Disney World collection of theme parks in Florida, shortly after it opened in 1998. The landscaping was terrific, and the zoo attraction was impressive.

But $45 was a hell of a lot to pay for a well-landscaped zoo.

Alas, the few existing attractions at Animal Kingdom were even lamer than those in Disney’s California Adventure when it opened in 2001, and that’s really saying something.

Since then, Disney has tried buffing up Animal Kingdom’s premiere attractions. One of their most recent additions, the Expedition Everest: Legend of the Forbidden Mountain roller-coaster that opened in 2006, isn’t just the best attraction in the park; it’s one of the best attractions Disney has ever created, on par with their breathtakingly creative Tower of Terror ride that first opened at Disney’s Hollywood Studios in 1994.

Expedition Everest is clearly an homage to the Matterhorn Bobsleds coaster at the original Disneyland. That ride, especially its “forced perspective” making it seem much larger than it is, was certainly impressive in its day (it opened in 1959). But despite occasional improvements since then, it’s since become dated.

Expedition Everest, meanwhile, is Disney at its most current, and its very best.

As with the most memorable of Disney’s attractions, Everest tells a story. In the foothills of the Himalayas in the fictional kingdom of Anandapur, the Himalayan Escapes tour company has embarked on a plan to take tourists up to the base camp of Mount Everest using the Darjeeling Ko Rail, an old steam train had once been used to bring tea down from the mountains. Problem is, the train uses a shortcut, passing through a “forbidden mountain” supposedly guarded by the legendary Yeti.

This is not the fastest or most intense roller-coaster you’ll ever ride. To get that, visit Universal Studios Islands of Adventure, or any of Orlando’s other nearby theme parks.

Still, the thrills are impressive given that it’s Disney, a company that makes as many of its attractions as accessible to as many people as possible. And it’s the mark of a good coaster that many of the drops and turns are scarier than they probably deserve to be, if only because they come in unexpected places (and because they tie into the overall story).

But what’s really remarkable about Expedition Everest is the breathtaking level of detail, both in the run-up to the ride and in the coaster itself. When we finally encounter the animatronic Yeti — out of commission for some time, but now apparently back in commission full-time — it absolutely doesn’t disappoint.

Good job, Disney! I think I’m finally ready to forgive you for that nine dollar burger.